Saturday, October 8, 2011

A Post-Apocalyptic Economy

Kaylen wrote a post about the things one should consider about survival in a post-apocalyptic world. Sure, food and weaponry are at the top of everyone's list, but what are your marketable skills in a P-A (because  post-apocalyptic is hard to type) economy? Kaylen is all set to crochet blankets, which will be great, everywhere north of Tennessee.

Medical personnel - you would think these folks would have it made in the shade. Not for help with zombie contamination. Everyone knows the "cure" for that is a haircut from the neck up. But who wouldn't trade their last jar of Jif brand peanut butter to have that pesky broken leg properly set?

Current and former Boy/Girl Scouts - that sounds like a transvestite club, doesn't it? But you can hook me up any day with someone who can start a fire, or cook a hot dog in a foil-lined box!

Farmers - once the Hostess snacks run out (because, let's face it, they never really spoil, do they?), we will be at the mercy of people who know what to DO with that wheat after it comes out of the ground.

Me? I am a teacher. I can prepare lesson plans that would knock your socks off! The Captain does something vaguely tech-oriented. We? Are dead meat. You'll be stacking our bodies like cord wood, as a kind of eat-through barrier for the undead.

What about you? What will you have to trade for your neighbor's stash of warm Mountain Dew?

Thursday, May 19, 2011

This Sh*t is Real

Get A Kit,    Make A Plan, Be Prepared. emergency.cdc.gov

While we are very happy that the Center for Disease Control is finally taking this seriously, there is a distinct lack of Zombie-dispatch advice in this otherwise very informative link. Do I pack a Louisville Slugger or an AK-47??

Wednesday, November 10, 2010

Saturday, October 30, 2010

Zombie Survival Planning

It's time for a little practical consideration, people. Captain Dumbass, my partner in zombie-related crime, sent me an email the other day, detailing his zombie survival plan for his new workplace. Granted, he lives and works near Vancouver, and the ocean is not far, but you have to get there first. That ocean won't be much good to you if you are tripping over the other toadies.

Please take a good look around your office or other place of work on Monday, and start planning your Zombie Attack Escape Plan. I know we Americans are not known for our exit strategies, but trust me when I say, I have thought this through.

This is the basis of my plan:



I am in the midst of fattening up my cube-farm mates with an always-full-of-chocolate-goodies candy dish. It not only slows them down to a waddle, the sugar buzz disorients them a little more than usual. What were these people thinking when they gave me the desk closest to the exit?

Share your plan below, and if any of my coworkers are reading this, just kidding! Ha ha ha!

Maybe.

Monday, October 25, 2010

Tuesday, October 19, 2010

Zombies Were People Too


Awesome t-shirt from TeeFury. Unfortunately it's not available anymore.

Monday, September 27, 2010

Dusting Off The... Well, Dust.

Been awhile, hasn't it. Whatever, I've got a new baby and a new job. Anyway, I bought this shirt from Blogography about two years ago. Don't know why I didn't think of posting it until now.