Please take a good look around your office or other place of work on Monday, and start planning your Zombie Attack Escape Plan. I know we Americans are not known for our exit strategies, but trust me when I say, I have thought this through.
This is the basis of my plan:
I am in the midst of fattening up my cube-farm mates with an always-full-of-chocolate-goodies candy dish. It not only slows them down to a waddle, the sugar buzz disorients them a little more than usual. What were these people thinking when they gave me the desk closest to the exit?
Share your plan below, and if any of my coworkers are reading this, just kidding! Ha ha ha!
Maybe.
6 comments:
Your plan also needs to be open to a huge number of variables. A plan for escaping work is a good start, but what about if you're at home? Shopping? On holiday? You need to be ready at all times and ready to adapt to whatever your situation. Always look for the nearest escape and the closest item that could be used as a weapon or a shield.
Dear Captain,
Shut the f*ck up! If you share this sh*t with everyone, you're just decreasing my chances of survival!
Dear Readers,
Pay no attention to that Canadian behind the screen...
While slowing down your co-workers is a good start I would also suggest distracting them with shiny objects and swag, such as; pens with logos printed on them and 100% recycled material tote bags. It works for librarians.
Hey - you guys ARE watching "the Walking Dead" on AMC, right? Right?!
Way too cool.
Wow, you are the coolest person to comment on my blog today!!!
I'm a first-time visitor to your blog from Cleveland. Saw a link to your site on Tera's "Olive Hue Designs" blog and decided to click-through.
I'm glad I did. You're pretty freaking cool.
I'm hitting you up on Twitter right now.
P.S. Butterfinger candy rules!
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